I’ve always professed that if someone would only give me the answers, then I’d be able to fix whatever’s wrong with my life.
I have this inner radar that’s paying close attention to everything that’s being said, by everyone; my coach, my clients, the internet. If I could just figure out what’s wrong, then I won’t have to work so f***ing hard. Yup, I dropped the F bomb.
Remember Bob Newhart, STOP IT!
“We can’t solve problems with the same kind of thinking that we used in creating them.” Albert Einstein
Last week I had the privilege of leading a break-out session for a conference for Administrative Professionals. I wanted the group to experience the impact of the stress they carry in their bodies. What better way to do that then show them what multi-tasking does to their stress levels.
Picture this, 2 circles of women, about 14 in each. I gave each circle a tennis ball and instructed them to toss it to on another. Simple enough, right? Then I added a 2nd ball & a 3rd ball. See where I’m going? By the time one group got to 4 balls, they started dropping them. They made it to 7 balls in total, with lots of the balls having to be retrieved.
The ladies had a lot of fun playing, but when they sat down and I asked who got stressed out by the game, quite a few raised their hands.
So, we dug a little deeper and came up with the cycle of how we can constantly be stressed.
We doubt something, maybe it’s a decision to apply for a new job, or we doubt our ability to make something happen, because it hasn’t worked in the past.
In comes worry. What do they think of me? Am I doing enough, I don’t want people to think I’m lazy or don’t work hard enough?
And, boom, we’re stressed. Do more, be more, work more.
And then for something completely different, we do it all again, over & over & over…..
“You are not your thoughts. You are the awareness of your thoughts.”
You’ve been carrying around these habits, patterns if you want to call them that, for such a long time.
Doubt - Worry - Stress - Repeat
I’ve been there, I can still go there. 40+ years of doubting me doesn’t just disappear overnight.
Here’s the thing though. Awareness, being able to recognize when my doubting voices start nattering in my head has become the key to my stopping. I actually say it out loud. STOP IT.
Then I take a deep breath in, slowly exhale and give myself permission to not know all the answers. Just like our negative thoughts, we can learn positive ones as well. I love introducing compassion as a practice.
READY to STOP the incessant cycle that is holding you hostage from the life YOU know you deserve?
I would love for you to join me along with 8 women on a 6 week journey. We’ll be meeting weekly, starting May 29th at 6:30pm Eastern for 2 hours.
Registration opens this Friday morning. Your investment, in you, is $197.00, Canadian.
Hear what past participants have said.
“I underestimated the impact of the group/phone coaching. I was excited to participate but really did not think it would be able to go as deep and leave so much impact as it did. So, I truly did get more than I signed up for!”
“To be gentle on myself - we all struggle with so many of the same things so I don’t feel so alone in my challenges.”
This will be the 4th time I’ve lead this program and it’s sold out every time.
Better still, let's connect by phone!